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| Inspirational The Office Quotes - Office Motivational Quotes |
The Office is an American comedy TV series. All the office quotes or lines will live on forever. This tv series was 9 seasons and 201 episodes. An NBC network series and story-based on the fictional Dunder Mifflin Paper Company, the everyday lives of office employees in the Scranton. The manager of the company, Michael Scott (Steve Carrell) and the character was very popular for the viewers that's time. Good positive office quotes. we have posted the best inspirational office quotes from the office quotes and the office Michael Scott quotes. Read the inspirational the office quotes and office motivational quotes of the list.
Best Inspirational Office Quotes From The Office Quotes
Sometimes I feel like everyone I work with is an idiot. And by sometimes I mean all times. All the times. Every of the times. -Kevin Malone, The Office, Season 8: Fundraiser
This is a documentary? Oh. I always thought we were like specimens in a human zoo. -Kevin Malone, The Office, Season 9: Promos
Michael is leaving. And apparently, they've already hired a new manager. And we're meeting him today. It's a lot to process. Paperwork-wise. -Oscar Martinez, The Office, Season 7: Training Day
I know you saw me with the Senator. I think I'm in love, possibly for the first time. So yes, Senator Lipton and I are having an affair. I hope that I can count on your sensitivity, maturity, and discretion. -Oscar Martinez, The Office, Season 9: The Boat
Oscar Martinez: I am dying to know what's in there.
Andy Bernard: Yeah, I know Oscar; we all are, but nobody's gonna open it. You'd have to be insane.
Creed Bratton: Hi, hello. -Creed Bratton, The Office, Season 8: Last Day in Florida
My future isn't going to be determined by seven little white lotto balls. It's going to be determined by two big black balls. -Darryl Philbin, The Office, Season 8: Lotto
There is no such thing as an appropriate joke, that's why it's a joke. -B.J. Novak, The Office, Season 2: Sexual Harassment
I feel God in this Chili's tonight. -Pam Beesly, The Office, Season 2: The Dundies
Michael Scott's Dunder-Mifflin Scranton Meredith Palmer Memorial Celebrity Rabies Awareness Fun Run Race For The Cure, this is Pam. -Pam Beesly, The Office, Season 4: Fun Run (1)
When I was a teenager, I was in an iron lung. -Creed Bratton, The Office, Season 2: The Injury
Society teaches us that having feelings and crying is bad and wrong. Well, that's baloney because grief isn't wrong. There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown. -Jennifer Celotta, The Office, Season 3: Grief Counseling
Society teaches us that having feelings and crying is bad and wrong. Well, that's baloney because grief isn't wrong. There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown. -Jennifer Celotta, The Office, Season 3: Grief Counseling
I have six roommates, which are better than friends because they have to give you one month's notice before they leave. -Toby Flenderson, The Office, Season 9: Finale
The Office Michael Scott Quotes and Office Sayings
Abraham Lincoln once said that, 'If you're a racist, I will attack you with the North.' And those are the principles that I carry with me in the workplace. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 1: Diversity Day
It's simply beyond words. It's incalculable. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 1: Pilot
No, I'm not going to tell them about the downsizing. If a patient has cancer, you don't tell them. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 1: Pilot
I guess the attitude that I've tried to create here is that I'm a friend first and a boss second and probably an entertainer third. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 1: Pilot
This is our receptionist, Pam. If you think she's cute now you should have seen her a couple years ago. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 1: Pilot
Is there something besides 'Mexican' you prefer to be called? Something less offensive? -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 1: Diversity Day
I'm sinking a few, you know. Swish, swish, swish. Nothing but net. And their jaws just dropped to the floor. African-Americans! -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 1: Basketball
That was offensive and lame. So double offensive. This is an environment of welcoming and you should just get the hell out of here. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 1: Diversity Day
I’m an early bird and I’m a night owl. So I’m wise and I have worms. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 2: Office Olympics
Reverse psychology is an awesome tool. I don't know if you guys know about it, but, basically, you make someone think the opposite of what you believe. And that tricks them into doing something stupid. Works like a charm. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Christmas Party
I don't want any special treatment, Pam. I just want you to treat me like you would some family member who's undergone some sort of serious physical trauma. I don't think that's too much to ask. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: The Injury
Here it is, heart of New York City, Times Square named for the good times you have when you're in it. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Valentine's Day
Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 2: The Fight
I enjoy having breakfast in bed. I like waking up to the smell of bacon, sue me. And since I don't have a butler, I do it myself. So most nights before I go to bed, I will lay six strips of bacon out on my George Foreman Grill. Then I go to sleep. When I wake up, I plug in the grill, I go back to sleep again. Then I wake up to the smell of crackling bacon. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: The Injury
Oh, look! A Sbarro. My favorite New York pizza joint. And I'm going to go get me a New York slice. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Valentine's Day
Well, happy birthday Jesus. Sorry that your party's so lame. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 2: Christmas Party
Jim and I are great friends. We hang out a ton, mostly at work. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: The Secret
Sometimes you have to take a break from being the kind of boss that's always trying to teach people things. Sometimes you just have to be the boss of dancing. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Booze Cruise
Presents are the best way to show someone how much you care. It's like this tangible thing that you can point to and say, ‘Hey, man, I love you this many dollars worth.’ -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Christmas Party
Jan is cold. If she was sitting across from you on a train and she wasn't moving, you might think she was dead. - The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 2: The Client
Toby is in HR which technically means he works for corporate. So he's not really a part of our family. Also he's divorced... so he's not really a part of his family. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Sexual Harassment
I hate so much about the things you choose to be. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Casino Night
I don't come up with this stuff, I just forward it along. You wouldn't arrest the guy who was just passing drugs from one guy to another. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Sexual Harassment
I would not miss it for the world. But if something else came up I would definitely not go. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 2: Office Olympics
Do you think that doing alcohol is cool? -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Drug Testing
It's not like booze ever kill*** anyone. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Booze Cruise
Yes, it is true! I, Michael Scott, am signing up with an online dating service. I need a username and I have a great one. Little Kid Lover. That way people will know exactly where my priorities are at. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Take Your Daughter to Work Day
You may look around and see two groups here: white-collar, blue-collar. But I don't see it that way, and you know why not? Because I am collar-blind. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: Boys and Girls
I want you to rub butter on my foot Pam, please? I have Country Crock. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 2: The Injury
The worst thing about prison was the dementors. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 3: The Convict
I love inside jokes. I'd love to be a part of one someday. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: The Convention
They say that your wedding day goes by in such a flash that you're lucky if you even get a piece of your own cake. I say that's crazy. I say let them eat cake. Margaret Thatcher said that about marriage. Smart broad. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: Phyllis' Wedding
Fool me once, strike one. Fool me twice, strike three. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: Traveling Salesmen
Webster's Dictionary defines wedding as The fusing of two metals with a hot torch. The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 3: Phyllis' Wedding
Two weeks ago, I was in the worst relationship of my life. She treated me poorly, we didn't connect, I was miserable. Now, I am in the best relationship of my life, with the same woman. Love is a mystery. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: The Job
Webster's Dictionary defines wedding as The fusing of two metals with a hot torch. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: Phyllis' Wedding
Any man who says he totally understands women is a fool. Because they are un-understandable. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: Women's Appreciation
I don't understand. We have a day honoring Martin Luther King, but he didn't even work here. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 3: Grief Counseling
I think Angela might be gay. Could Oscar and Angela be having a gay affair? Maybe! Is that what this is about? -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: Gay Witch Hunt
Bros before ho**. Why? Because your bros are always there for you. They've got your back after your hoe rips your heart out for no good reason. And you were nothing but great to your ho*. And you told her she was the only ho* for you. And that she was better than all the other hoes in the world. And then, suddenly she is not your ho* no mo. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: A Benihana Christmas
About 40 times a year, Michael gets sick but has no symptoms. Dwight is always gravely concerned. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: Beach Games
Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject. So you know you are getting the best possible information. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: The Negotiation
How to take off a woman's bra: You just twist your hand until something breaks. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: Ben Franklin
If you don't like it, Stanley, you can go to the back of the bus.Or the front of the bus or drive the bus. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 3: Beach Games
I want today to be a beautiful memory that the staff and I share after I have passed on to New York. And if Toby is a part of it, then it'll suck. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 3: Beach Games
You cheated on me? When I specifically asked you not to? -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 4: Goodbye, Toby (1)
I am running away from my responsibilities. And it feels good. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 4: Money (1)
I took her to the hospital. And the doctors tried to save her life, they did the best they could. And she is going to be okay. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 4: Fun Run (1)
I'm not superstitious but I am a little stitious. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 4: Fun Run (1)
I don't hate it. I just don't like it at all and it's terrible. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 4: Launch Party (1)
When I was five, I imagined that there was such a thing as a unicorn. And this was before I had even heard of one, or seen one. I just drew a picture, of a horse, that could fly over rainbows, and a had a huge spike in its head. I was five! Five-years-old. Couldn't even talk yet. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 4: Local Ad
Look at those wrinkles. Blacks do crack. Not crack the drug. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 4: Survivor Man
Guess what, I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 4: Fun Run (1)
Well, it's love at first sight. Actually, it was.. No, it was when I heard her voice. It was love at first see with my ears. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 4: Goodbye, Toby (1)
Friends joke with one another. 'Hey, you're poor.' 'Hey, your momma's dead.' That's what friends do. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 4: The Deposition
Do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I like to be liked. I enjoy being liked. I have to be liked, but it's not like this compulsive need to be liked, like my need to be praised. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 4: Fun Run (1)
I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 5: Stress Relief
I tried, I tried. I tried to talk to Toby and be his friend but that is like trying to be friends with an evil snail. I feel like I'm dying inside. I feel like Neve Campbell in Scream II. She thinks she can go off to college and be happy and then the murderer comes back and starts killing off all of her friends. I learned a lot of lessons from that movie, this is just one of them. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 5: Frame Toby
You will not die! Stanley! Stanley! Barack is President! You are black, Stanley. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 5: Stress Relief
An office is for not dying. An office is a place to live life to the fullest, to the max, to An office is a place where dreams come true. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 5: Stress Relief
Tell him to call me ASAP as possible. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 5: New Boss
Don't ever, for any reason, do anything for anyone, for any reason, ever, no matter what. No matter where. Or who, or who you are with, or where you are going or... or where you've been ever. For any reason, whatsoever. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 5: The Duel
Sometimes I'll start a sentence and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 5: The Duel
No, Rose, they are not breathing. And they have no arms or legs. Where are they? You know what? If we come across somebody with no arms or legs do we bother resuscitating them? I mean, what quality of life do we have there? -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 5: Stress Relief
I have got to make sure that YouTube comes down to tape this. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 5: Stress Relief
Well, well, well, how the turntables. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 5: Broke
Sometimes I'll start a sentence and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 5: The Duel
I am a theatrical person. Growing up I always thought I would become an actor, because, I have these memorization tricks that I use. For instance, I learned the Pledge of Allegiance by singing it to the tune of Old Macdonald: I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America / And to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God. / With a woof-woof here and a woof woof there, here a woof, there a woof, everywhere a woof woof. -Michael Scott (Steve Carell), The Office, Season 5: Lecture Circuit (1)
Ok, too many different words from coming at me from too many different sentences. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 6: Mafia
I say dance, they say 'How high?' -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 6: St. Patrick's Day
I would say I kind of have an unfair advantage because I watch reality dating shows like a hawk, and I learn. I absorb information from the strategies of the winners and the losers. Actually, I probably learn more from the losers. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 6: Happy Hour
If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 6: Body Language
Hate to see you leave but love to watch you go. 'Cause of your butt. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 6: The Cover-Up
Oh God, my mind is going a mile an hour. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 6: The Cover-Up
Hi, I'm Date Mike. Nice to meet me. How do you like your eggs in the morning? -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 6: Happy Hours
Make friends first, make sales second, make love third. In no particular order. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 6: The Delivery (2)
It is St. Patrick's Day. It is the closest that the Irish will ever get to Christmas. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 6: The Delivery (1)
It's a good thing Russia doesn't exist anymore. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 6: Scott's Tott
I am Beyonce, always. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 6: Body Language
I'm making some cosmetic tweaks to help create a more appealing environment. Is that dishonest? Well, think of it this way: when you look in the mirror and you see your push-up bra and your fake eyelashes and your make-up and your press-on nails; the principles that I am applying to the office are the same ones that have made Lady Gaga a star or any number of drag queens. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 6: The Banker
I guess I’ve been working so hard, I forgot what it’s like to be hardly working. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 7: Training Day
Gabe Lewis: Michael, you've just physically assaulted an employee. Can we talk in private?
Michael Scott: Yes. Of course. What's this in reference to? -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 7: Nepotism
I am a huge Woody Allen fan. Although I've only seen 'Antz.' But I'll tell you something, what I respect about that man is that when he was going through all of that stuff that came out in the press, about how 'Antz' was just a ripoff of 'A Bug's Life,' he stayed true to his films. Or at least the film that I saw, which, again, was 'Antz.' Thing is, I thought 'A Bug's Life' was better, much better than 'Antz.' Point is, don't listen to your critics. Listen to your fans. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 7: Threat Level Midnight
Saw Inception. Or at least I dreamt I did. -The Office Michael Scott Quotes, Season 7: Nepotism
If you break that girl's heart, I will kill you. That's just a figure of speech. But seriously, if you break that girl's heart, I will literally kill you and your entire family. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 7: Viewing Party
It's a pimple, Phyllis. Avril Lavigne gets them all the time and she rocks harder than anyone alive. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 7: Sex Ed
I had a great summer. I got west Nile virus, lost a ton of weight. Then I went back to the lake. And I stepped on a piece of glass in the parking lot, which hurt. That got infected. Even though I peed on it. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 7: Nepotism
The world sends people your way. Ryan came to me through a temp agency. Andy was transferred here. No idea where Creed came from. The point is, you just have to play with the cards that you're dealt. Jim, that guy is an Ace. Dwight is my King up my sleeve. Phyllis is my Old Maid. Oscar is my Queen. That's easy. Give me a hard one. That's what Oscar said. Toby is the Instruction Card you throw away, Pam is a solid 7, and you know, Ryan is probably like a 2. Sometimes 2s can be wild, so watch out. And I'm obviously the Joker. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 7: WUPHF.com
Dwight Schrute's Inspirational The Office Quotes
Michael is like Mozart, and I’m like Butch Cassidy. You mess with Mozart and you’re gonna get bullet in your head, courtesy of Butch Cassidy. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 2: Office Olympics
Michael always says, 'K-I-S-S, keep it simple, stupid.' Great advice, hurts my feelings every time. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 3: Initiation
I overslept. Damn rooster didn't crow. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 3: Traveling Salesmen
I don’t have a lot of experience with vampires, but I have hunted werewolves. I shot one once, but by the time I got to it, it had turned back into my neighbor’s dog. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 3: Business School
It's better to be hurt by someone you know accidentally, than by a stranger on purpose. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 4: Survivor Man
Identity theft is not a joke, Jim! Millions of families suffer every year. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 3: Product Recall
Jim told me you could buy gay-dar online. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 3: Gay Witch Hunt
The eyes are the groin of the face. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 4: Branch Wars
Get a friend, loser. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 5: Customer Survey
You better learn your rules. If you don't, you'll be eaten in your sleep. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 5: The Duel
Growing up I performed my own circumcision. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 5: Baby Shower
Nothing stresses me out. Except having to seek the approval of my inferiors. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 5: Stress Relief
Smoking is gonna save lives. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 5: Stress Relief
In the end, the greatest snowball isn't a snowball at all. It's fear. Merry Christmas. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 7: Classy Christmas (1)
Oh, this is gonna feel so good getting this thing off my chest that's what she said. -Michael Scott, The Office, Season 7: Goodbye, Michael
My perfect Valentine's day? I'm at home, three cell phones in front of me, fielding desperate calls from people who want to buy one of the fifty restaurant reservations I made over six months ago. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 7: PDA
I'm gonna intimidate him, ok? Watch this So anyway, she said that is the biggest penis I have ever scene and I said I know! That's why I brought you to the penis museum, where tickets are a thousand dollars. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 7: The Sting
You're a perfectly fine toilet. I'm just an extraordinary piece of crap. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 8: Trivia
Powerpoints are the peacocks of the business world; all show, no meat. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 8: Special Project
A real man swallows his vomit when a lady is present. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 8: After Hours
The Civil War history industry has conveniently forgotten about the battle of Schrute Farms. Whatever. I'm over it. It's just grossly irresponsible. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 8: Gettysburg
The Schrute's have a word for when everything in a man's life comes together perfectly. Perfectenschlag. Right now, I am in it. I finally get a chance to prove myself to corporate. I am assembling a competent team. I am likely a father. I am so deep inside of perfectenschlag right now. And, just to be clear, there is a second definition, 'perfect pork anus', which I don't mean. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 8: Special Project
I really like Andy these days. He's pretend, and he does exactly as I tell him to. All that will change when real Andy comes back tomorrow. Unless he comes back as pretend Dwight. In which case, we're in for an epic, confusing showdown. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 9: Couples Discount
Dwight Schrute: Most people don't even know that a candy cane represents a shepherd's crook. Which I assure you does not taste like peppermint. It tastes like sheep feces.
Oscar Martinez: How would anyone even know......
Dwight Schrute: Have you ever tasted a shepherd's crook? -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 9: Dwight Christmas
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I ate too much bone marrow. -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 9: Finale
At first I drove myself crazy thinking about the things I should have done differently. I never should have played that joke on Erin. I never should have hollowed out this damn pumpkin in the first place. Then I realized that I was being silly. I mean the pumpkin should rot off of my head in a month or two. Right? -Dwight Schrute, The Office, Season 9: Here Comes Treble
Jim Halpert's Inspirational The Office Quotes
I miss Dwight. Congratulations, universe. You win. -Jim Halpert, The Office, Season 3: The Return
I am about to do something very bold in this job that I've never done before try. -Jim Halpert, The Office, Season 4: Job Fair
Yeah. Phyllis called me Michael. And I will always and forever be haunted by that fact. -Jim Halpert, The Office, Season 4: Survivor Man
I think it's great that the company's making a commercial, because not very many people have heard of us. I mean, when I tell people I work at Dunder Mifflin, they think that we sell mufflers or muffins or mittens or...and frankly, all of those sound better than paper, so I let it slide. -Jim Halpert, The Office, Season 4: Local Ad
I've never been a kiss-up. It's just not how I operate. I mean I've always subscribed to the idea that if you really want to impress your boss, you go in there and you do mediocre work, half-heartedly. -Jim Halpert, The Office, Season 5: Dream Team
Michael Scott: Why am I so sad? Am i doing the wrong thing?
Jim Halpert: Absolutely not. It's just that sometimes goodbyes are a bitch.-Jim Halpert, The Office, Season 7: Goodbye, Michael
Stanley just drank OJ out of my mug and didn't seem to realize that it wasn't his hot coffee. So the question has to be asked, is there no limit to what he won't notice? -Jim Halpert, The Office, Season 7: Costume Contest
There's this thing that people tend to do with billboards. How do I put this? If there's an opportunity for a graffiti artist to work in a phallic shape, interacting with the artwork, it'll happen, and Andy gave them that opportunity. -Jim Halpert, The Office, Season 8: Garden Party
Dwight, listen: no matter what happens, you gotta forget about all the other stuff. You gotta forget about logic and fear and doubt. You just gotta do everything you can to get to the one woman who's gonna make all this worth it. At the end of the day, you gotta jump. You love Angela, Dwight. I think you always have. -Jim Halpert, The Office, Season 9: A.A.R.M.
Kelly Kapoor's Inspirational The Office Quotes
Who says exactly what they’re thinking? What kind of a game is that? -Kelly Kapoor, The Office, Season 4: Money (2)
I mean, I'm not a slut but who knows. -Kelly Kapoor, The Office, Season 2: The Carpet
Meredith: I thought you're not supposed to wear white to a wedding.
Kelly: I know but there was an emergency. I look really good in white.
-Kelly Kapoor, The Office, Season 3: Phyllis' Wedding
I think sometimes people are really mean to the hot, popular girl. -Kelly Kapoor, The Office, Season 5: Lecture Circuit (1)
You guys I'm like really smart now. You don't even know. You could ask me, Kelly, what's the biggest company in the world? And I'd be like, 'blah blah blah, blah blah blah blah blah blah.' Giving you the exact right answer. -Kelly Kapoor, The Office, Season 7: Nepotism
Ultimatums are key. Basically nobody does anything for me anymore unless I threaten to kill myself. -Kelly Kapoor, The Office, Season 7: Classy Christmas (1)
I talk a lot, so I learn to tune myself out. -Kelly Kapoor, The Office, Season 7: Counseling
Mistletoe is not an excuse for sexual assault. -Andy Bernard, The Office, Season 8: Christmas Wishes
Sometimes I get so bored I just want to scream, and then sometimes I actually do scream. I just sort of feel out what the situation calls for. -Kelly Kapoor, The Office, Season 8: After Hours
There's a lot of beauty in ordinary things. Isn't that kind of the point? -Pam Halpert, The Office, Season 9: Finale
Andy Bernard's Inspirational The Office Quotes
My parents used to scramble to find babysitters, so they could take my little brother to do stuff. -Andy Bernard, The Office, Season 7: Andy's Play
Pam Beesly: Oscar thinks that having a dog is just like having a baby.
Angela Martin: News flash: If you didn't carry it around for nine months, it isn't your kid.
Pam Beesly: Exactly. Unless you adopted, of course.
Angela Martin: That is where we disagree.
-Angela Martin, The Office, Season 8: After Hours
Tough day. Yes. But I feel good. I put the office in their place, took a bunch of painkillers, drank a bottle of wine, took my pants off. I just feel good. -Andy Bernard, The Office, Season 8: Test the Store
I haven't proposed to anyone in years. -Andy Bernard, The Office, Season 8: Pool Party
My ex is meeting my sex. Which is always scary, you know? And not just because you think they might talk about your penis. That's just part of it. -Andy Bernard, The Office, Season 8: Christmas Wishes
There are two things I am passionate about recycling and revenge. -Andy Bernard, The Office, Season 9: New Guys
Ryan Howard's Inspirational The Office Quotes
I got away with everything under the last boss and it wasn't good for me. So I want guidance. I want leadership. Lead me when I'm in the mood to be led. -Ryan Howard, The Office, Season 7: Search Committee (1)
I'm in love with Kelly Kapoor. And I don't know how I'm gonna feel tomorrow or the next day or the day after that, but I do know that right here, right now, all I can think about is spending the rest of my life with her. Again, that could change. -Ryan Howard, The Office, Season 8: Angry Andy
Maybe we weren't right together, but, it's weird. I'd rather she be alone than with somebody. Is that love? -Ryan Howard, The Office, Season 8: Angry Andy
Ryan Howard: I'd like to make a toast: to the troops. All the troops.
Both sides.Party guest: That's weird.
-Ryan Howard, The Office, Season 8: Garden Party
Erin Hannon's Inspirational The Office Quotes
Holly is ruining Michael's life. He thinks she is so special, and she's so not. Her personality is like a 3. Her sense of humor is a 2. Her ears are like a 7 and a 4. Add it all up and what do you get? 16. And he treats her like she's a perfect 40. It's nuts. -Erin Hannon, The Office, Season 7: The Search
Erin Hannon: Why don't you like him?
Michael Scott: What is there to like? He's just, he's a weird little skeevy guy with no waist. Why do you care whether we like him or not?
Erin Hannon: I care if you like him.
-Erin Hannon, The Office, Season 7: Viewing Party
Robert California: That is very cold.
Erin Hannon: Yea, that is old. I asked if you wanted a cold beverage, and you said coffee. -Erin Hannon, The Office, Season 8: The Incentive
I haven't had so much fun since seeing Zooey Deschanel at the Coachella music festival. -Erin Hannon, The Office, Season 8: Test the Store
Stanley Hudson's Inspirational The Office Quotes
I have been trying to get on jury duty every year since I was 18 years old. To get and go sit in an air-conditioned room, downtown, judging people, while my lunch was paid for. That is the life. -Stanley Hudson, The Office, Season 7: Classy Christmas (1)
Yes, I have a dream, and it's not some MLK dream for equality. I want to own a decommissioned lighthouse. And I want to live at the top. And nobody knows I live there. And there's a button that I can press, and launch that lighthouse into space. -Stanley Hudson (Leslie David Baker), The Office, Season 7: WUPHF.com
Life is short. Drive fast and leave a sexy corpse. That's one of my mottos. -Stanley Hudson, The Office, Season 8: Tallahassee
Phyllis Vance: I can't be around sad people, it just makes me sad.
Stanley Hudson: I'm the same around horny people. -Stanley Hudson, The Office, Season 9: Moving On
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